Quick Family Stats
The Married Couple: Ben and Crystal Goins
Years Married: 15
Children: Reagan, Age 10 | Reggie, Age 8 | Wyatt, Age 6 | Jude, Age 5 | Miles, Age 3
Current Location: Chesapeake, Virginia
Our Match.com Success Story
The internet has made a big impact on my life beginning with my husband, Ben. Ben and I met on Match.com while he was finishing medical school rotations in different cities across the nation and I was in my first years of teaching. He wanted to meet a girl from “home” in the Hampton Roads area because he was originally from Suffolk. So, he “winked” at me and we exchanged emails. We emailed back and forth for a few months before meeting at a Starbucks in town.
I was so nervous, but the conversation flowed naturally. We dated long-distance for a year and a half while he finished medical school and applied for residency.
Marriage Life and South Carolina
Our love turned into logic quickly when he accepted an invitation to do a residency in South Carolina. We were engaged for six months and only lived together for two months before we had to move.
For me, stress was high the whole time. From wedding planning while teaching to living with a new person who was home all the time. It was an adjustment in my mind and heart that marriage was going to change every aspect of my life.
I cannot say I welcomed the changes always. Years later, I am so grateful I did. My husband, Ben, is the relationship that taught me how to commit to others and love them for who they are. He has grown me and I have grown him. All the credit goes to our faith in Jesus and his love for us. We spent three years in South Carolina and we consider it a second home. We hope to return to Greenwood, SC one day and introduce our children to the treasured community.
Marriage, Kids, and Ministry
While Ben and I were in South Carolina, we had tried to have children for two years and were unsuccessful getting pregnant. Then residency ended and we returned back home to Virginia. I questioned whether my dedication to teaching negatively impacted our fertility journey, so I took four years off once we moved home.
Ben took his first doctor job and we started volunteering for a high school ministry called Young Life. Within two months of being a Young Life leader, we got pregnant with Reagan. Then, two years later, we had Reggie too.
Ministry was the highlight of those four years at home. Raising our kids in front of teens was comical from breastfeeding to discipline. However, I felt like it was so rewarding to let them in and see our imperfect beginnings. Ben and I are never too proud to admit when we do not know what we are doing. We just pray, try, and learn. I think our teens appreciated that of us and we still “do life” with many of them today.
Working Full-time While Raising Kids
I rejoined full-time teaching in 2016 and had a rough start getting myself acclimated. At the time, we had just moved to a new city, so my job required a commute. Also, I had children now. So, both my daughter and son needed childcare.
We were so thankful that my job was close to my daughter’s school. So, my mother in law dropped her off and I picked her up. Then, we commuted home. My son had a nanny due to medical reasons, so we kept him at home as well.
When I returned to work, I got pregnant three additional times to welcome Wyatt, Jude, and Miles to our family. With each child, we have learned to adapt and adjust. Steady childcare options are so crucial to our health and well-being as working parents especially since Covid. Ben and I have both changed jobs due to family needs during the pandemic. We have settled with sending our children to private school while we both work. The steady after school care has been such a blessing to our lives.
The Network of Relationships That Have Supported Us
Ben and I feel so fortunate to be loved by so many other people. In fact, this picture illustrates the vastness of our relationship network as a couple. From Virginia to South Carolina, we have explored so many different cities and even taken mission trips across the world. Our Filipino and American families have supported all of our personal and professional endeavors from school, work, holidays, and children. Then, we have the multiple homes we’ve lived in and the neighbors we’ve met.
Moreover, we have the jobs we’ve worked and the coworkers who became our friends. Within the church, school, and ministry, we’ve met so many other families who have grown to be like family themselves.
For all our loved ones and friends, we are so grateful for you. Thank you for being part of our past, present, and future!
Back to Ministry: Grassfield Young Life
In November 2023, over a couple of weeks, I felt a spiritual yearning inside of me to pray specifically for the Young Life ministry at Grassfield High school. With a sense of urgent curiosity, I called the area director to find out that their leaders had stepped down the weekend prior. He proceeded to tell me that the school hasn’t had steady leaders for the last two years, but the students are faithful to come out.
My husband and I told him that we would be faithful to pray about the need and even attended the Young Life banquet a few weeks later. However, the “calling” to serve never left us. So, reluctantly, we texted the area director and let him know we feel called to serve as Grassfield’s new leaders. So, we started in February of 2024. This is a picture of our Grizzly tribe meeting at our house for weekly Bible study. We LOVE it!
In God’s timing, we hope to relocate our family near the school to run our microschool and serve in our ministry. Doing life with teens again seems so right and we love that we can build up a community around our own kids. God is good to open up these door of opportunity again.
“When we learn how to become resilient, we learn how to embrace the beautifully broad spectrum of the human experience.”
— Jaeda Dewalt